C-suckles

I was attempting to decorate the outside of the house a bit. I purchased 3 boxes of C-sicles to hang from the gutters above the front porch. Seemed like a good idea at the time - C9 lights across the top and icicle lights too. Only they are 2 light strands attached together, so 2 plugs. No biggie. They have a nasty tendancy to tangle and since it was cold the icicles wires were contorted into weird shapes. I forge ahead using my trusty pole with the twist off gutter clips. First one goes on great. Next one won't go on. Hmm. Drag out a ladder and discover gutters are full of ice which means the only clips I have won't work. Well, the C9 lights have clips on them which should slide between the ice and the gutter lip. First one goes on fine, second one breaks off, third one breaks off. Then the whole thing falls off and lands on the concrete porch with louds pops of breaking glass. The C9s exploded like IEDs and sent glass shrapnel everywhere. Fuck, fuck, fuckety, fuck, fuck. So now I'm cleaning up broken glass. I dump the broken strand in a paper sack and toss it in the garbage. I returned the 2 unopened boxes to the store and just about had the woman at customer service in tears of laughter from the description of the antics with this miracle of Chinese engineering. She wished she had a video of it. I'm sure it would win a prize on some gag show. If you could hear anything over the bleeping out of all the colorful language.

My ultrasound went ok, I guess. Both ovaries are ok and the 3 smaller fibroids are the same. The only gotcha is the 2 larger tumors each grew by a centimeter in 2 months. That means a half centimeter a month. I go back in six months for another ultrasound. If they grow at that rate they could be 3 centimeters larger. My only option is a hysterectomy since there are so many tumors and other options aren't appropriate or effective. I could live without ever getting another period again. If I experience any increase in symptoms I go back earlier. I had trouble peeing before my last period. She said the tumors could be pressing on the bladder or urethra. I feel like an 80 year old man with a bad prostate.

And now, I'll leave you to enjoy the holidays with the lyrics from the South Park classic Christmas song - Dead, Dead, Dead:

Dead, Dead, Dead, someday you'll be dead
Dead, Dead, Dead, someday we'll all be dead.

The minute we're born, we start dying,
We die a little more every day..
Young or old, rich or poor,
There's nothing we can do to stop it..
So look long at that Christmas tree,
It may be the last one that you see..
Decorate your house in green and red,
'cos someday you'll be dead..

Dead, Dead, Dead, someday you'll be dead
Dead, Dead, Dead, someday we'll all be dead.

It might happen in a couple months
Or 50 years from now..
But no matter when it happens
It will seem too soon to you..
So be sure on Christmas eve
When you snuggle into bed..
That you thank God for your family
'cos someday they'll be dead..

Dead, Dead, Dead, someday you'll be dead
Dead, Dead, Dead, someday we'll all be dead.

Who knows how many Christmas's
Are left in their short lives?
Nobody knows, that my point!
Enjoy them while you can.
And so on Christmas morning
Let good tidings fill your head..
What a festive season,
Someday you'll be dead

Dead, Dead, Dead, someday you'll be dead
Dead, Dead, Dead, everyone you know, dead.
A very Merry Christmas to you!
Dead, Dead, Dead..

Merry Christmas Everybody!